Where do I even start? Well, I successfully finished my first 50k run. Anyone who talked with me in the weeks leading up to this big day, I was extremely nervous. I kept brushing it off like it was not a big deal because I was putting a ton of pressure on myself. I had just rolled both of my ankles in the last month or so, and that put a damper on my training. Even though I had done "enough" training, I did not feel prepared mentally. Even on the drive to Fundy early Saturday morning, I was still having conversations with myself in my head telling myself I was ready. Self talk!
Something extra special about this run is that almost everyone in the group was new to this route. This was our first ultra marathon distance all together. We had been talking about this day for months, and many of us actually experienced injuries quite recently that may have taken us out of the run. But, we all got out of our cars with our packs on, ready to see what the day had for us.
The first trail (Coastal - 10k) is a tough one, and is always extremely intimidating to me. So, let's just say I was still anxious for the first few kms. But, I had Julia Wright by my side, and she spoke some words that stuck with me every minute of the day. She said that if I acted like a winner throughout the whole run, and imagined what it was going to feel like when I finish... I would be able to push on with an extra amount of confidence. That conversation was meant to be, because from that moment on, I had a different type of stride. I knew that If I was extra smart with my fueling/hydration, and pacing... I could finish strong. I think that was the first time that I felt 100 percent confident about my abilities finishing my first ultra.
We finished Coastal, we were 11km into our 50k day, and I was ready for what was to come. This route has over 5000 feet of elevation gain, and is no joke. But, I was feeling strong, and fuelled up enough. When we rolled into our 26k mark, and I got a sandwich into me, It was pretty surreal to think that we were over halfway done a day that we had talked about for so long. I remember thinking "wow, this is not as scary as I thought it would be." That thought quickly turned into "Sarah, you can actually do big things." It's one thing to tell others that they can easily do something, or they are "ready." But, to feel that about yourself is a whole other story. I was proud of myself. But, it was not over yet. :)
From the half way, our bigger group split up into smaller groups naturally, and I was running with Vipul and Mark. This little group turned out to be just perfect for the last half of the 50. The conversations we shared, the funny moments, and me yelling out "Vipul, we just ran a marathon" at the 42.2km mark, made the end extra special. I got to the 40km mark and I felt like I could run the last 10km with no problem. THAT was surprising for me. I was feeling strong, and I had successfully kept up with my fuelling to the point where I had to pee every 10 minutes. I remember looking at Mark and saying "we are almost done?!?" When you look at the number of kms that are ahead in a day, it seems pretty impossible. But, with the right pacing, you CAN end a run like that feeling like you want to keep running. To my delight, I was that person. I finished my first ultra with energy to keep going. That feeling was exactly how I wanted to end my experience on that loop of trails, because I know I want to push myself into even bigger distances. Knowing me, I would have pushed that anyways even if I was slogging along. I don't know if I would call it "determination" or "stubbornness" but it gets me to where I want to go. ;)
All in all, I was so thrilled with how the day turned out. The most beautiful trails, with some pretty amazing people. I do need to give a huge thank you to Mark McColgan (leader of Saint John Trail Running) for leading us so well, and for constantly bringing new people into hitting huge goals for themselves. That type of leadership is rare, and he walks with a heart for community that is so obvious to anyone who meets him. It was extremely amazing to see a group full of first timers finish a huge day of hard trails. For me, that was all made possible by his pacing, and constant reminders of us being able to do way more than we could think or imagine.
I know every run does not feel amazing, and there have been many that have felt pretty crappy for me, but I am celebrating the work that I put in to get to a place where I felt strong on my first ultra. There will be humbling moments to come, and there will be times where I still doubt myself, but this was proof that I have what it takes for long distance adventures. I won't lie, I am already thinking to how I will prepare for my first 100k run. ;)
